My Art Keeps Staring at Me

Tonight is a Harvest moon and while I'm staying in after a hectic day of taking care of some family I'm in a weird and esoteric mood tonight.

I was trying to watch the movie Backrooms and did this digital art on my tablet. I turned off Backrooms after an hour or so. It was boring and maybe it was over my head but I couldn't get into it. I really do like this art though.

One funny thing about my art is that I'm very intuitive with the art. I don't usually go in with an idea of purpose and I just move my stylus around and see what it creates. Sometimes its crap in which case it never sees the light of day. Sometimes it makes something cool, like this piece. I haven't named it. I don't even know what it is. It's trippy and it keeps staring at me.

When I make art I think in a lot of esoteric and spiritual terms. I don't know if the art I create is coming from a deep part of my psyche or some spiritual realm. Maybe its a mix of both.

I think doing spiritual art would be rather cool and I tend to think in magical terms, so I think it may be a snapshot of something from the other side. I don't know what. Sometimes in my dreams or during meditation I'll astral project. Its all quite fuzzy after the fact many times, but this feels familiar. Like its the portal I go through while astral projecting.

I know some of this may sound nutty to some of you. When I tell my therapist about my witchy stuff I have to preface this with "This is about to get weird, so don't commit me."

He usually laughs as he won't commit someone unless they are a danger to themselves or others, but I like to cover my bases. So, this piece to me could be a portal or it could be a end of a doorway. One part of me wonders if its like the light at the end of the tunnel, but that's kind of a scary tunnel.

That's the beauty of art. It can mean a lot of things, or mean nothing. I think its kind of pretentious that every piece of art has to have some big, deep dark heavy meaning. Sometimes things just look cool. Sometimes we don't know where they come from, my brain just says this has to be pushed into existence but doesn't tell me why.

Maybe in those cases its meant for someone else. If that is so, then I hope whoever it is meant for finds it. And if they could tell me what it means in the meantime, that would be great. As you probably noticed I didn't have a real theme with this blog post. I spent a lot of time lately writing detailed essays, I think sometimes its ok to just spit out some art and then barf up some words to see what formulates. One thing I try to do on this blog is always stay honest and raw. Sometimes that means just being weird and letting the words just flow and see what comes out. Maybe something brilliant or not so much.

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